Mommy Redefined
So I have this good friend. She's a mom. She's also one of the most forward direct feminist women I have ever met. Sometimes her way about handling people and their perceived flaws, slips or inappropriateness leaves me floored. And I thought I was outgoing and forward- well this woman leaves me with a gaping jaw sometimes. For example, she sees stupid, inappropriate office politics that do nothing but degrade and diminish the actual work environment and respectability so she will not mince words as she points out this area of improvement to her boss. However, redefined as a mother she is lacking this same self confidence and view as she sometimes commands at work.
It's the typical mommy redefined.
She worked her fucking ass off doing academia that many people are intimidated by, she gets a job that is a mere stepping stone in the path of excellence and service that she always expected for herself, then as many men and women do in this day and age, she went and had it all- a family.
A mother is selfless many say. A mother is hectic. A mother is giving. A mother teaches. A mother is strong.
In my friend I find many of these characteristics, but as a mother at times there is a conflict between self and self. Self as she started down her path of adulthood and being as, and then self as she sees her priority currently. Sometimes they mesh (I'd like to think I do a decent job at this), other times it does nothing but spur conflict.
For my dear friend who is utterly academically amazing, an amazing friend, and a BEAUTIFUL mother, I see a conflict occurring as her priorities shift and she becomes mommy redefined.
As mommy redefined, we become not the people we envisioned as a 5th grader realizing what college can lead to, but instead we realize that perhaps we took that path and then became diverted down the less surefooted, yet gloriously beautiful path called motherhood. This path is like one down by the river, muddled at times by rain puddles, lushly flowing with fresh green grass, tripping us with stones, arched by clouds and blue skies. Many trials and stumbles along the way, but originally something took us to this less defined path that as we walk along, we may stumble, fall, or not know where it leads us, but the diversion from that original path is worth it so much more then can be defined by words. And so this is what mommy redefined is. Not what appears in cookie magazine or by Katie Holms or any other modern definition of what motherhood or humanity is, but what we happen upon along our self defined paths that become redirected as our lives as mothers and PEOPLE become redirected into something unknown, scary, and yet glorious all at the same time.
And so for my dear friend, I hope only that she redefines that confidence she had as an amazing woman into the self-realization that she is an amazing mommy as well. That the stones that are round, colorful and trip us up can sometimes send us hurling down a path that is apprehensive to continue along at times, but we would never ever consider NOT traveling down, for the pleasures of mommy redefined are worth every moment we have put into our past and blindly, into our future.
Love you!
It's the typical mommy redefined.
She worked her fucking ass off doing academia that many people are intimidated by, she gets a job that is a mere stepping stone in the path of excellence and service that she always expected for herself, then as many men and women do in this day and age, she went and had it all- a family.
A mother is selfless many say. A mother is hectic. A mother is giving. A mother teaches. A mother is strong.
In my friend I find many of these characteristics, but as a mother at times there is a conflict between self and self. Self as she started down her path of adulthood and being as, and then self as she sees her priority currently. Sometimes they mesh (I'd like to think I do a decent job at this), other times it does nothing but spur conflict.
For my dear friend who is utterly academically amazing, an amazing friend, and a BEAUTIFUL mother, I see a conflict occurring as her priorities shift and she becomes mommy redefined.
As mommy redefined, we become not the people we envisioned as a 5th grader realizing what college can lead to, but instead we realize that perhaps we took that path and then became diverted down the less surefooted, yet gloriously beautiful path called motherhood. This path is like one down by the river, muddled at times by rain puddles, lushly flowing with fresh green grass, tripping us with stones, arched by clouds and blue skies. Many trials and stumbles along the way, but originally something took us to this less defined path that as we walk along, we may stumble, fall, or not know where it leads us, but the diversion from that original path is worth it so much more then can be defined by words. And so this is what mommy redefined is. Not what appears in cookie magazine or by Katie Holms or any other modern definition of what motherhood or humanity is, but what we happen upon along our self defined paths that become redirected as our lives as mothers and PEOPLE become redirected into something unknown, scary, and yet glorious all at the same time.
And so for my dear friend, I hope only that she redefines that confidence she had as an amazing woman into the self-realization that she is an amazing mommy as well. That the stones that are round, colorful and trip us up can sometimes send us hurling down a path that is apprehensive to continue along at times, but we would never ever consider NOT traveling down, for the pleasures of mommy redefined are worth every moment we have put into our past and blindly, into our future.
Love you!
posted by Karen at 10:13 PM
